AfrikaBurn, turn up for what?!

turn up

The AfrikaBurn madness has begun. There are countdowns on Facebook, outfit inspirations on Insta and daily rants about the ‘spiritually uplifting experience’ of the event. I personally, don’t understand the fuss.

No, I’ve never been. And I have no intention of driving 6 hours to end up in the middle of the Karoo with half naked people and dust in my face, my sinus would never handle it. I’m more worried about the sand than the naked folks – to be honest. How exactly would that work? I start eating my cheeseburger but there’s a sudden gust of wind, then what? Turn my back against the breeze to avoid cheeseburger with a side serving of sand? Go into the closest building – wait, there are none! More like hop into the nearest tent and hope for the best- by best, I hope for fully dressed individuals who are not trying to barter my burger from me.

So I’ve heard everything from ‘you’ve never been, you don’t understand’ to ‘you’ve never been to Afrikaburn?! *insert judging shocked face*. And none of this is actually incentive to go. Maybe I could do it for my Instagram account. I can already see the photos – swirling fire flames against a black night sky, selfies with the flamboyantly dressed attendees and arty images taken inside Aztec tents. Nah, I still can’t get over the sand – sand everywhere.

Then I was thinking, if I can’t go to AfrikaBurn, why not bring AfrikaBurn to me?

The theme for the 2016 event is – X. Representing both the Roman numeral 10 – a cycle- and the letter X representing an open signifer – a time for past reflections and future imaginings. Very inspiring right? so why waste a great theme and a chance to party? There will be no stalking of Insta accounts and no FOMO this year. While some of your friends will be making the trek to the Karoo, not everyone you know will be going. So embrace the theme, gather the troops and light some shit up.

Easier said than done so here’s the DIY guide:

  1. Gather those who were left behind:

Have the event on the same weekend as AfrikaBurn. Everyone loves a good get-together so give them a reason to flock. This will not be a pity gathering, so invite everyone who will bring the fun vibes and not mope about missing out.

  1. Get inspired:

Pull out that table cloth that was too weird to use for Christmas and dust off that old tea pot. Now put tablecloth on the table and fill that teapot with some vodka and done. Hello welcome drinks. #quirky

  1. Embrace the theme – X:

Ask everyone to bring along something they want to forget – an old photo of the one that got away, that ugly sweater they haven’t worn in a year or that unlucky pair of shoes.

  1. Light it up. Light it up:

If you’re not old enough to drink, you’re not old enough to play with fire.

But for the more mature audience, combine some common sense with Google DIY tips and start a bon fire in your backyard. Be safe about it.

  1. Now bond:

Share your crappy memories with the group. Then throw that old sweater, unlucky shoes or photo in the flames. Let go! Now share your future imaginings. Your hopes, your dreams and everything on your vision board.

AfrikaBurn, turn up for what?

  1. Now eat, drink and have a heck of a good time.

p.s: Don’t forget to Insta the fun!


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