Sometimes I cry in public

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“I am the type of person that will sit in the bathroom and cry, but then walk out like nothing ever happened” – Random Tumblr Quote that’s all over the internet

Society tells me that it’s embarrassing to cry in public – at school, in the mall, at a concert, at work. Society tells me that I should hold back my tears until I’m in the privacy of my bedroom and only then is it okay to let go. When I am alone, tucked away within the four walls of my room. Like my tears are evidence of weakness that innocent bystanders should not witness. Like my tears are not the expression of raw emotion and an aspect of my humanity.

I’m sorry if my tears offend you but if you could feel what I’m feeling you’d cry with me.

Most of the time I’m not even sad.

One time I cried at a music festival and the guy next to me looked at me like “what the fuck are you doing that’s embarrassing”.

If his face was an emoticon it would be a combination of *cringe* and *confused*

He didn’t understand but he judged my tears because society tells us that it is not okay to cry in public. Like the tears of the crier is a reflection of those of around them – embarrassed by association.

I’m sorry if my tears offended him but I was 10 metres from my favourite band. Their music helped me through late nights, countless essays and the lowest moments of being a student. The experience was just… too much… and I reacted like a person feeling overwhelmed in that moment and cried.

But I’m sorry if my tears offended, I should have done the correct thing – you know, moved to the closest toilet, isolated and alone and then sobbed. What was I thinking crying in public?

I once cried on a date.

We were sitting in a dim lit cinema and protestors on screen were rallying together.

I cried.

Not because I was uncomfortable or sad – but I cried because the image of unity was a beautiful one.

The movie was over, the date ended and well, let’s just say… I’m single.

Society tells us that it’s not okay to cry in public.

But as a public crier, let me say one thing:

I will not apologize for the tears that you witness, I will not apologize for the emotions that you see.

I will rather feel deeply and express openly than spend one moment trapped behind an emotional façade that pleases people I don’t even know.

My tears might embarrass you, but don’t mistake them as a sign of weakness.

I cry in public as a basic expression of emotion.

I cry in public because brave enough too.

I cry in public because I’m only human, and despite what society tells us – that’s okay.

 

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